Those on the Verge of…
Raising a hand on the defenceless is intolerable and abhorrent. But the Muslim society today, is what it is. A great majority of them are either ghetto-dwellers, or of ghetto mentality, writes SYED IQBAL ZAHEER.
These writings have been provoked by a letter we received from a lady being ill-treated by a husband, who appears to be sort of rougish. But in the lives of Muslims this is not something new.
As the Muslim society grows old and rots, the uneducated, untrained and the undisciplined ones are having a field day. We don’t think admonitions will do any good to these insensitive ones. Will a society ever recover, which has husbands of the kind that has been described?
There are no rays of light in the horizon, and no trace of willingness on the part of the Ummah, especially the part living in India. To pin hope of a revival requires a heart and mind of someone who has no heart and mind any different from those of plants.
Now, let us take up the case on hand, and go straight to the causes: You will discover that the true causes for a man beating his wife, (if the family is not slum-dwellers) are not social behaviours. It is in failures in the husband’s life.
These people are talentless, unable to work hard, lack efficiency in whatever they are employed for, and hence are harvesters of abuse themselves, under criticism, and denied growth. So, if they come home, they are in a disappointed state – and, angry: angry at life and at being discredited.
They have to spend their anger somewhere, on someone. The nearest, the weakest, become his target. For them, the real cause is not the social issues they face – as silly as those issues are – but the anger which they earn during the day.
They have to beat their wives.
Therefore, although we feel intensely for the lady, we cannot offer any help, except to say that the people around you appear to be a cheap kind. In our own circle of life, even a child raising his voice, is looked at as an uncivilized one. They are told, “The foulest of sounds is that of a donkey.”
What about raising a hand on the defenceless? To us, it is intolerable and abhorrent. But the Muslim society today, is what it is. Great majority of them are either Ghetto-dwellers, or of Ghetto mentality.
The correction then, since they are not going to become Muslims, lies with you, the victims. You must face this up with quietism. See that they are not provoked. But they will not leave you in peace: as peaceless they themselves are. They will provoke you and come back with abuses.
You must realize that they are mentally sick and so provocative. You must respond with quietness. Just remain silent. Don’t try to be good to them. They are senseless to that. Just be quiet.
Your need for conversation should be met with your friends. Accept life as it comes. Your change of husband might not work. The next man will be like your last man. The next in-laws will be like the previous in-laws. They are all moulded by the same mould.
The society you live in, has long back decided not take Islam seriously. So, do not look for alternatives.
Alternatives don’t exist.
On your part, you need to do your five-time Prayers and devote your free time to self-development.
Books are a good source of education and training.
Listen to good speeches and give some time to the needy and helpless.
Stop dedicating time to TV and the mobile (social medias). Of the causes of deterioration, these are the two main agents. They will take away your time, and give you back nothing in return but dissatisfaction to your soul. They will make you feel worthless and good for nothing.