Obligations of Parents Towards Their Children

In it, only the chanting of Azan in the ear of Hazrat Hasan is mentioned, but in another Tradition quoted in Musnad-i- Abu ya’ali Mosuli, on the authority of Hazrat Husain bin Ali, and reproduced in Kanzu Ummal, it is told that the holy Prophet prescribed the saying of Azan in the right and Iqamat (or the second call to prayer just before the prayer commences) in the left ear of (the new-born child), and, also, explained its propitiousness. He said that, on account of it, the child remained safe from infantile epilepsy.

As these Traditions go to show, the primary claim of a child on his family was that his ears, and through the ears, his head and heart were made acquainted with the Name of God, and with His Oneness and the Call of Faith and Namaz. The best way to it, evidently, is that Azan and Iqamat were said in its ears, as these impart the knowledge of the spirit and fundamental tenets of Islam in a most effective manner.

The holy Prophet has enjoined the saying of Azan and Iqamat in the ears of a Muslim child, at the time of its birth, and the offering of Namaz-i-Janazah (Funeral prayer) when a Muslim dies and his body has been bathed and covered with a shroud and made ready for the burial. He has, thus, stressed that the life of a Muslim begins with Azan and ends with Namaz, and ought to be spent in the way it is done while waiting and preparing for Namaz after the Azan has been given. Besides, the foremost claim of a Muslim is that Azan is said in his ears at the time of his birth and the last is that Namaz-i-Janazah is offered over him when he passes away.

Tahnik 

One of the manifestations of the deep devotion the Companions had for the Prophet was that when a child was born in their family, they brought it to him so that he might bless it, and apply, on its palate, the pulp of a date etc, he had chewed himself and drop the saliva in its mouth which, they believed, would have the effect of averting evil from the child and bringing it good fortune. It is called Tahnik in the Islamic parlance.

Several instances of Tahnik are found in the standard collections of the Traditions. From these, we learn that when a child is born in a Muslim home, it should be taken to a virtuous bondsman of the Lord to receive his blessings and have the Tahnik done. It is one of the Sunnats which have, now, sadly become extinct.

Aqiqa 

In almost all the communities of the world, the birth of a child is considered a blessing and some ceremony is held to celebrate the event. Besides being natural, it, also, serves a special purpose, and makes it known, in a most suitable and dignified manner, that the father has accepted the child as his own and there is no doubt or suspicion in his mind concerning it. It shuts the door to many a mischief that can arise in future. The custom of Aqiqa (The ceremony of shaving the head of a new-born infant on the seventh day of it’s birth, and a sacrifice made, and a feat held on that day) was observed among the Arabs, even during the Age of Perversion, for that very reason. The hair on the child’s head, with which it was born, was cut a few days after the birth, and an animal was sacrificed as a mark of rejoicing which is a characteristic feature of Millet-i-lbrahimi (the community of the Prophet Ibrahim or Abraham). While preserving the practice, in principle, or, rather, exhorting his followers to observe it, the holy Prophet gave appropriate instructions, and himself set an example of how it was to be done.

The Aqiqa ceremony, as these narratives show, consists of two acts: the shaving of the head, and the sacrifice of the animal. There is a peculiar identity between the two acts, and these acts are among the religious practices of Millet-i-Ibrahimi. In the Haj, too, they go together and the pilgrims have their heads shaved after the Qurbani (i.e., the sacricial offering of animals). Thus, Aqiqa, also, is a practical demonstration of our association with Hazrat Ibrahim as well as of the fact that the child, too, is a member of the Ibrahimi community.

What showing of respect to one’s children denotes is that they should be treated not as a burden, but a blessing and a trust of God, and brought up with care and affection.

In another version of the same Tradition, the incident is, also, mentioned which had led the Prophet to make the above observation. It is narrated that a very poor woman, with two daughters, came to Hazrat Ayesha’s place to beg. By chance, Hazrat Ayesha had only one date with her, at that time, which she gave to the woman. The woman broke the date into two parts and gave one part each to the girls. She did not eat anything of it herself. When, after sometime, the holy Prophet came, Hazrat Ayesha related it to him, upon which he remarked, “The bondsman or bondswoman upon whom there is the responsibility of daughters and he or she discharges it well and treats them with affection, the daughters will become for him or her a means of deliverance in the  Hereafter.”

In another account of Hazrat Ayesha of the above Tradition, quoted by Imam Muslim, it is stated that a poor woman came to her, holding two little daughters in her arms, and asked for charity. Hazrat Ayesha gave her three dates of which she gave one each to the two girls and was about to put the third in her own mouth that the girls asked for it as well. The woman, thereupon, did not eat it herself, but gave half of it to one girl and half to the other. Hazrat Ayesha was so strongly affected by it that she described the incident to the sacred Prophet. The Prophet, thereupon, said, “On account of this very act of the woman, God gave for her the decision of Paradise and freedom from Hell.”

The two events may have taken place at different times, and, it can, also, be that it was the same incident and the variation was due to the difference in the statements of the narrators.

In these Traditions, the holy Prophet has not only told that kindly treatment was the natural right or claim of the daughters, but, also, that the bondmen who fulfilled the obligations towards them in a good and proper manner would be rewarded with Paradise in the Hereafter. He, further, gives the joyful tidings that such a man will be close to him, on the Day of Last Judgement, as the fingers of a hand are, when joined together.

In this Tradition, it is enjoined upon parents not to discriminate among their children when it comes to giving them something as a gift etc.” [Such a course has been condemned by the holy Prophet as unjust and unfair. Some authorities have even gone to the extent of calling it Haraam (forbidden), but a majority of them, including three of the founders of the four leading schools of Islamic Jurisprudence – Imam Abu Hanifa, Imam Maalik and Imam Shaf’ee – hold, on various grounds, that though it is not Haraam: it is Makrooh nevertheless, and highly undesirable.

Some legists have concluded from it that though, after the death of the parents, the share of daughters in ancestral property is half of the sons, in their lifetime, the share of both, the sons and the daughters, is equal. Therefore, whatever, the parents give to the sons, in their lifetime, should, also, be given to the daughters.

In it, the marriage of the children, too, on their attaining the marriageable age, has been made a responsibility of the father. But, alas, we are growing increasingly indifferent to it mainly because we have made marriage a most tedious and expensive affair by following the example of others and adopting their customs. If we take pattern by the good example of the Prophet and begin to perform marriages as he had performed his own marriage or the marriages of his daughters, the whole thing will be as easy and simple as it is, so to speak, for a Muslim to celebrate the Friday prayers. Blessings will, then follow of which we have deprived ourselves through thoughtless imitation of un-Islamic societies.